What does it mean to make a movie that promotes keeping a spark of wholeness even when we are shattered?
What I want for my audience is two potent experiences.
One, they leave the theater with an increased capacity to notice that love heals.
And that inside “love” there is a profound tenderness, an ability to sit with things – no hurry to say they should be something else, something better, something more perfect or different.
From the position of wholeness, all of us can be included.
I want them to leave filled with simple compassion and hope and a sense of wonder .
But I also want them to leave the theater with a burning in their hearts to protect our children, to get out there with enough healthy aggression to step up and say “No” when they can stop a child from getting battered.
I want it all.
It has been the unconditional positive regard of some of my Elders that taught me what healing feels like. They have held for me a terrible paradox about my own experience – on one hand letting me know that “This should not have happened.” And on the other hand, reminding me when I could hear it, “This happens all the time. Now what do you do?” I could not heal without both voices because I needed someone to be the Mother Bear and someone to be the World Weary Truth Teller.
No one who told me I should be thinking or feeling something different helped at all.
Once there was trust with my helpers, then I could let them point out where I was re-wounding myself with my looping thoughts and feelings.
It was powerfully effective to learn to sit in stillness and watch my own inner crazy with dispassion and then simply surround the whole picture with compassion.
Slowly, over time, an image of a Good Me was reflected back from these loving Elders, a Me that was hurt but not essentially broken. Their gaze included understanding of all the things we had to leave to the Mystery. The Elders that have helped me have a pretty good idea that they don’t have a final answer.
My commitment to the making of JANE is that she be true to the paradox: the simplicity of love and its power to heal, and the complexity of the powerful forces and feelings that work below language and don’t really care about our philosophies. The ones that would jump front of a moving truck to protect a child.